The Gypsy...

Just imagine... 

your walking along the road to nowhere, you know somethings got to happen because your life's in the gutter, and, you also realise that If you disappeared right now, no one would miss you. You've accomplished nothing. Your thoughts and mood, have been dark for a long time. 

You look around but your vision is cloudy, you're walking, aimlessly. Then it starts snowing. Within a couple of minutes the snow begins to fall hard. You're not dressed for winter, you left the house in a hurry.  Music, you hear music. It's a Christmas Carol...  we wish you a merry Christmas... we wish you a merry Christmas...  its Christmas!  Is it really Christmas? her intuition tells her to follow the music.

In the distance the glow from fairy lights cuts through the haze of falling snow. There are voices, music, and laughter.  It's been so long since I laughed.  I wonder, could I do that again? ... Maybe not.  Since you left, the world's felt lonely, and the way you left confirmed my importance.  Since then, my time has been spent reevaluating who I am, my purpose, and where I'm going, or actually, do I want to be here? and like a recording, I'm stuck...  Death is final.  Its so inviting, but not to be taken lightly. I need to think everything through.  Mind you, its not like anyone will miss me, but have I finished, am I really done?

Gaiety is up ahead, the music sounds beautiful, but can I feel beauty, right now? So many questions, so much uncertainty. The music alters, it's gypsy music, violins, and fiddles, jig out the beautiful, and the dark, reminding me of how we use to dance. 

Wiping snow from my eyes, I'm startled as a tall lady steps out from in-front of her brightly coloured stall, 

"Hello my lovely, may I invite you into my space, I have a feeling you won't regret your visit"

Her dark curly hair, cascades down, despite being tied up in a bright turban scarf which holds golden coins that jiggle as she moves. Dressed like a Gypsy, her dark eyes softly stare. She's waits for an answer. 

What do I have to lose? I whisper to myself. Her patience is inspiring,  I know I'm supposed to answer, but this overwhelming, inadequate feeling, monopolises my mind.

"Come, let's talk, I sense you need a friend"

Feeling comfortable, I reach out to hold her hand. The Gypsy pulls me through her sequinned curtain, revealing the smallest room which is beautifully decorated. A tiny round table, two blue velvet covered chairs, shelves, that home books, trinkets and treasures. In the middle of the table sits the most exquisite, crystal snow globe, which rests on a intricate, gold stand, raising it from the linen it sits upon. My senses heighten, I smell delicious aromas, and essential oils.  

"Please, take a seat, let your experience begin" 

Sitting down, I'm unable to draw my eyes away from the globe, its light reflects silver, and golden specs of incredible light, whilst tiny flecks of snow, float around a scene I can't quite see...

The Gypsy settles herself, and asks,

"Shall we begin, my lovely?" 

MJ Ewen

Destiny Calls...

 

The last sound I heard were my screams... ... ... ...

I've been waiting... sometimes you have to wait, watch, and believe. 

You made a promise, so now you must keep it.  

A sharp intake of breath made his body stiffen. Tilting his handsome head, he asked,

"Do I know you?"

"You do, I said, we met a thousand years ago and I told you, we'd meet again"

gazing into my eyes he moves closer...

I knew he loved my answer,  I had him. Yes. Hook, line and sinker. I allowed my arms to rest loosely by my side, I luxuriated in the silence and waited for my prize. 

Wetting his lips, his desire emanated.

There are moments in life when we take opportunities which present themselves. This was one of those moments... I loved that I knew what was happening. The alarming thing is he didn't know me, but I knew him. I'd know him anywhere. 

Destiny beckons.. and I am it's willing victim. An adventure's about to begin. I open my arms out wide to welcome him in.  

MJ Ewen

 

Her Darkness...

Image from Pinterest

 

To look, you wouldn’t think she had a dark mind. But she has…

Over the years, darkness had collected pockets of light and mercifully this was her salvation, her enlightenment, which usually turned out to be her get out of jail card. She always thought the journey would be filled with mist and overrun with negativity, but she was proved wrong when those pockets of light appeared. In each mysterious pocket, there lived a century of light, love, laughter and despite any darkness, there was a rich history. It turns out she had a billion topics to explore, a million journeys to live, with a thousand loves, to love.

She was luckier than most, and learned, not just from her own mistakes, she also learned from others. She deemed that responsible for the keys to her life, and she knew, those who touched her life were the locks that held her keys so snugly.

She used the dark for many things, her stories are endless... and I recall she told me several times that the dark can be scary, but I was to remember how it could also be comforting. 

 

MJ Ewen

The Investigation...

 

Image from Pinterest

Meet Alan King. Private Detective... Smokes like a trouper. A lover of the under-dog. He loves coffee, although prefers whiskey, engages well with the female of the species, but cant help himself, hes old school, and relaxes more with the boys. Nothing ever surprises him, hes seen and heard it all. 

Love this character, and not surprisingly, Chapter 8 belongs to him. I'm having to take a bit of time out to research criminology and crime dating back to the 1930's. I have to be honest, I'm out of my depth on this subject, but I'm determined to research, to make sure I give it a good shot. (fingers-crossed)

Already I'm racing ahead, cant wait to get into the other chapters however, I endevour to practice self discipline, I need to do it right. So much done, yet so much to do...

Have a great week ahead and until sometime soon... 

MJ   

Flames of Passion...

He had my name on him, so why did he choose her?

Isabelle is struggling with what she witnessed in the club last night, watching Alma and Shay together, isn't what she needed. This... she is quick to remind me, will end in tears. 

If ever there was a character who was persistent in my ear, its this one. Isabelle doesn't leave anything alone, she's like a dog with a bone, and pecks away at you. However, I cannot let her in right now, because I have to complete Chapter 7, and commence Chapter 8, with the investigation around the murder of Alma's father. If I'm honest, I think I could write a whole book on Isabelle, shes turned out to be an amazing character, with a lot to offer. 

Today the word count must be high, and if I see flames of passion rise from my finger tips as they fly over the keys, I will be one happy writer. 

I might add that right now I have company, Jiminy Cricket has joined me, and today he sits on my shoulder. It's always great to have someone who believes in you. 

Until next time... 

MJ Ewen 

 

A Still Mind...

Image shared from Pinterest.

A still mind is everything, and this is whats needed in the Essie household. Alma is yet to tell her tale. Isabelle is Darkness, where Alma is Light. Alma will be introduced shortly and the novel will take on a whole new meaning... The reasons, whys, and wherefores, will come to the front, and plots which have accumulated, and festered, will continue to take on a life of there own. 

My writers journey is exciting, it's one with no expectations, and no pressure. Not everyone gets it. Not everyone will love me... I'm not everyone's cup of tea, but that's ok because I love myself, I've made my peace with most everything, and because I have I find it easy to love and accept others. My writers brain allows healing every-time I sit, think, wonder and visualise, scenes, characters, and plots. I have so much to write, and I never seem to run out of the visual stories which regularly run through my brain, however, I'm fortunate, because I have the time to do this and I know time isn't a luxury that others have.

Till next time... 

MJ Ewen 

 

Sweet Arthur Essie...

She sulks in the shadows and hides in the dark... 

Shush my sweet Arthur, come... step closer, look into my heart as it glows just for you. You've got this, haven't you Arthur? don't let me down... don't ever let me down. There are always consequences to disappointment, but you know that don't you darling? 

Chapter 5 is progressing. The story deepens, and actions begin. Those actions affect every single character with devastating results. Sometimes I never quite know what Isabelle is going to get up to but very soon Alma will be here, and then plots will thicken. 

MJ Ewen

 

Isabelle...

 No one could predict the monster Isabelle would become, but its the backstory, and characters accounts that will help the reader understand the whys and wherefores... Even so, it's Isabelle's hard heart, and despicable treatment of those around her that will make it difficult to sympathise.  She's a twenty year old, hell-bent on seducing, her benefactor, Mr Arthur Essie. 

No one will get in her way... No-One. 

This week the word count has been healthy. The ideas and direction of Chapter 5, have flowed nicely...

Watching, and waiting from the perimeter of the Garden Party, Isabelle knew he'd arrive soon. She was fed up of hanging around, she had plans, and he would listen. It was her time.  Then, she saw him enter the party holding his wife's hand, smiling, as he introduced her to business colleagues.  

Isabelle's fury exploded in her chest, it burned, she felt as if she was on fire and it made her eyes water.

She never cried, not ever. 

MJ Ewen

Inspiration...

 

Oh, this is so true... 

Other people's opinions are just that... Opinions, and of course it goes without saying that they're entitled to theirs. But you my darling, be true to yourself, and if you're at peace then all is well in your world. I have taken time to wish I could make everyone happy, but I can't, and as we know, that's an unrealistic intention... We have to remember; we can't fix everybody!  

There is nothing wrong with having the intention of inspiring others, and motivating where we can. 

Another day of writing and being with the characters in my novel. I find it so relaxing, unless of course I'm struggling with where a character has to go, or what they have to do, but it usually happens as I sit back and ponder.

Have a beautiful day... 

MJ Ewen 

 

A Difficult Scene...

 Another day to get my senses into Chapter 4... of  my current WIP, The Alma Essie Story. 

Two generations come together, and a third is conceived. A chapter about two women and the event that makes them realise they are connected in so many ways. They have to learn to see through there own pain and remember who they are, why they're here, and the many reasons they love one another. 

Scenes can be difficult, especially when something bad happens. But without certain events, the story would not progress, or come together. 

With this particular scene, which I confess has been challenging, I hope I've written it with a sensitivity that does the characters and a repulsive event, justice, because this happens all over the world, and maims its victims, and the families of those involved. 

Regardless of the Word-Count, Its a beautiful day... Enjoy 

#AmWriting  

MJ Ewen   

I'm A Strong Lady...

I am a strong lady however; it dawned on me this week that I always apologise even when I’m not at fault. On occasion this has caused me to become angry with myself but listen, a great big beautiful, light-bulb moment happened recently, when it became very clear why I do this...

I do it because I was born with an over abundance of maternal instinct, and I think this is because my own biological mother did not possess a seed of sense, let alone the maternal stuff which keeps others safe, well and happy... I say I’m sorry because I want to pass on a warm message to others, so that they know without hostility that it’s ok as well as healing to be sorry. It doesn’t mean their weak if they portray this kindness. In fact after a life-time of experience, I know this is a quality of strength which is much better shared.

I’m a great believer in that we’re able to touch another with love, warmth, compassion, and kindness. I also believe you can still connect even if they are angry to the point they walk away, and consider you to be either a person with a hidden agenda or weak...

Although another beings aggression use to hurt my feelings, like others, I only ever have the best intentions. I often find myself smiling inside because despite their initial reaction, the one thing I’ve realised is that most people act instantly, and at some point they will reflect. It is then I hope they will see the incident, and feel the correct emotions in a much calmer space where hopefully they’ll learn.  

All WE have to do, is never give up... there will always be people who don’t care but usually at some point in life they will, and that is where you were/are the lesson.

I sense some mumbles at the above message but let me say this, I’m also realistic and I know at times it’s definitely much better to walk away. I am blessed with instinct which tells me the people who are worth my time and those who are not... Also there are certain things that should never be apologised for... for instance: your emotions, for being you, for loving another, standing up for what you believe, being honest, forgiving someone, following your dreams etc.

"I write with love and respect, and hope my words simply reinforce what you already know, if you don’t know then hopefully it might make you think"...

 Namaste

© Jane Ewen July 2015

How Writing Has Positively Influenced My Life...

My own Image used.

“I am participating in a Writing Contest: and it’s all about:
How Writing Has Positively Influenced My Life ~ Hosted by Positive Writer.”

http://positivewriter.com/writing-contest-how-writing-has-positively-influenced-my-life/

Memories are sometimes beautiful and often painful... but in my opinion they are oh so necessary, and help to make us who we are...  

Addressing the question, in what way has writing positively influenced my life?

I am showered with immense possibilities...

Mist descends as my mind becomes a black and white film-show; it takes me back to unimaginable years.  Bleak rooms, with bad people... I owned a voice that was never heard, and an imagination never nurtured but despite all of that I miraculously possessed a burning desire for the impossible.   In dark days I walked a lonely path where I made up invisible friends. It was only when I learned how to read and write that I sensed real magic. As a child I stayed with that magic as reality was cruel. I recall making lines and circles, and then pretending to write amazing stories, I could be whatever character I chose to be, but always I wanted to be the mummy.  Some years later I was surprised to hear that the authorities believed what had saved me, was my gift of holding my hands over my face to pretend I was invisible.  

When I was  fifteen years old I put pen and paper away, I destroyed all the stories which promised someone to love me, and I threw away precious magazines, and books, because the time had come for me to look after myself...

I didn’t know then that it would be quite some time before I picked up a pen again, and feel those long-lost stirrings of my own magic, but I did and I never looked back. I realised even then, that writing, sharing, and caring was an extraordinary way of connecting, communicating, planting seeds, to learn, and show those that are interested it’s possible to connect on another level, a deep level where a writer is able to express, or better still give a piece of themselves.  As you may imagine when I started to write again, it was like I couldn’t stop, my heart, head and hand just produced all these thoughts and words, my blog received some and the rest I filed away.  

During my absence from writing I did not waste time, I had a career, married and I became a mother. All those dark years of pretending... finally a mother and I confidently say I’m the best mother I can be. During those wonderful years my yearning to write did start to tap-tap me on the shoulder but I was fulfilled and happy for the first time in my life. I had a family. Then a crisis, a heartbreaking tragedy struck my heart. One afternoon for five hours I waited by the hospital bed of a loved one, I went over my life; I made promises to god as I begged for help. I also made a promise to myself that I would no longer put my writing on hold, and I would write as often as I wanted. Within that writing I knew I would always spend time to pass inspirational messages on to whoever was interested, because as a reader I also knew that we often read things, they strike a chord and again those random words touch a place that helps, and heals.

Of course I have dreams... I happily work on projects with the vain hope that one day when the time is right they will be released, but for now all I want, is to see my words flow and know they mean something to someone. As a writer I also understand words can be powerful, and I will always remain mindful to make sure my words won’t hurt, wound or maim, aha, unless of course I’m writing a story.   

In a flurry of writing I am clear that for me there are no expectations, in fact it would be fair to say that despite no expectations, my beloved writing has indeed healed me, and it’s in that gratitude I want to share my positive journey.

 

~Jane Ewen~

 

Knowing...

'Sad Child' Image from www.pxleyes.com

I know... I don’t know how, but I KNOW... have you ever felt the presence of knowledge, yet you couldn’t explain how, why, or when you became aware of the information... It isn’t knowledge of a prediction, and it isn’t looking into a crystal ball at the future and feeling certain about someone’s life... it’s a knowing which magically hits you. The knowing can happen when a person is talking, listening or simply stood in your company... or at an event and suddenly you feel overwhelmed with information, feelings, opinions, beliefs and views. You could be writing, watching TV, making plans...  The information can be so extraordinarily strong, that you know without doubt how another is feeling, what they need to do, and nine times out of ten you’re able to execute a plan without hurting the feelings of any sensitive soul... Back in the day my knowing was scary... but not anymore, I know what I have to do. I truly believe this came from a whole childhood of feeling inferior, and uncertain.

There is a beauty to uncertainty and I’d like to share with you what it means for me... When you’re stuck in that moment, that frozen, dying, period when you feel your losing it... stop... wait and feel the tick of time as it allows you to hold on to permission to do something about your moment of truth... You do not have to rush for anyone, time was made for all of us to relax in whilst we made good decisions, and if you made a bad one, that’s ok to because mistakes are made to learn from...

Lifting a clenched fist, rage overwhelms the whole of his being. He stumbles...

A weird motion of uneasy slowness all around catches in his throat, he realises this isn’t normal, this is not what normally happens, and this is definitely not how it had gone before... what the hell was different?

The stupidest gaze lands on the baby, she turns and looks deep into his soul... He flinches, anger stabs at him hard, and he raises his fist higher. Anger at boiling point, he needs to vent, to let go... Baby blue eyes flood with liquid, and her warmth strikes him. Reluctantly he lowers his hand, and picks her up; insistently he lifts her high into the air. Her job is done...

As a child growing up in an uncertain world she knew things...  she knew stuff she didn’t understand, she knew death was not the end, and for reasons unknown she also knew it was simply a transition. She knew she was wise beyond her years, she knew a great deal of information, information that was inexplicable in terms of how she could have known such things at her young age. Knowledge gave her power, a power she had always been aware of, but thankfully way back then she’d always felt the all consuming power would remain with her always. The important thing through all of this is that the knowing is, and would always be the truth. How she knew this she couldn’t say... she just knew. The strange thing is it wasn’t just a clear knowing; there were other things, things she would only be able to share as her journey unfolded... There’s no rush, no need to worry, only a delightful sense of peace, and calm.

 

© Jane Ewen

Peace...

Image used from Pinterest quoting Jimi Hendrix.

I read this on my travels today...

One finds peace in their life when they first find peace in their heart.
~ Sue Krebs~
From Soul-Speaking
https://www.facebook.com/Jane.Ewen?ref=hl#!/SoulSpeaking?fref=ts 

Peace has always meant a great deal to me, and given I have walked a journey where at intervals I have known such unpredictable disturbances, and lived through catastrophic changes; it is not surprising I understand the importance of such a beautiful gift. Seeing the above quote caused a whole array of thoughts, and feelings to spill...

There is something in understanding that when you feel no peace there is always, sadly, a catastrophic reason... I don’t mind sharing I was once in a place where I felt no peace at-all. Its one thing to be restless and wonder what the hell’s it all about, but for it to be taken, broken, and thrown to the four winds, making you question everything you thought you knew, now there’s something that could and virtually can destroy you. Occasionally it’s realistic to be acquainted with the perplexing knowledge, that maybe one or two things might knock you off guard, but when the big one comes, and literally floors you... you know without doubt, you’re in trouble.

I don’t mean to ramble, because my intention here is to bring a specific point in a concise piece, you may be on your knees, and the problem might still be in your life, but surprisingly it’s possible to come to terms with its devastation, because the strange thing about life is that mostly it has an out of the ordinary way of turning around, and unexpectedly, it can present you with questions, and answers that actually you hadn’t thought of.

I can only report I am victim, and a witness to this testimony, that no matter how dreadful it gets there is usually a way forward, and I suppose that depends on you, your strength, your support, the resolve, and commitment to stay upright and focused on those around you, including yourself... Give yourself time; make a plan, and never mind taking one day at a time, sometimes it has to be an hour, a moment or even a minute. It can be done, but take the pressure of yourself and those around you by keeping your expectation to a minimum. Remember stuff happens but life goes on.

Good Luck my friend.

 If one breathes in hope, and then breathes out peace, a ripple will crisscross the world.

~JaneEwen~

I Believed...

(A Thousand Years - Christina Perri Lyrics)

 I Believed... By Jane Ewen.

I always believed you would find me... It was written in
ancient, timeless scriptures which foretold that I would love you.

 

Instinctively I knew I wouldn’t be able to keep this treasure, this dream, if I didn’t believe.
I understood a deep, knowing... that I'd unconditionally give you all that I am, and the best thing was I saw as clear as any day, that I would be everything to you. That never-ending
invisible list which was built from years of being with beautiful people who
despite their best intentions were not YOU... I wondered aimlessly through life,
and l lived countless experiences, all of which would miraculously bring me to
a moment in time, a moment that would last forever... I wanted you; I implored the
universe for you to catch me, because I knew you’d be the one who would safely
hold my heart. I knew with inexplicably certainty, that you’d be the one who
would see through my walls.  

The beat of our music is magnificent.

I use to struggle to find a reason why I should be loved, but
just by being close you answered many questions, you ticked boxes. My
invisible, constrained list magically began to fade. Truth enveloped me, it
spoke to my soul, ice melted as it spelt words, and I cried, buried my face in
the warmth of you as I hugged your spirit. You whispered simple words of beauty, and managed to convey to me, with an honesty I’d only ever dreamed of, that you were here, you were really
here – at long last LOVE had found me. Oh my word, my lord, the absolute acceptance,
the beautiful, overwhelming feeling for the first time of being able to be ME. Someone
loved me, for who I am, no more pretending... This was so healing, and as all of
the hard years melted away, so forgiveness kicked in...   

Throughout my  life which was often hard, there had been a few happenings,
some good, some bad, as well as a few questions, with a few doubts, but in the
end, once I was secure it all managed to show me that if you believed hard
enough, truth will happen, and a special love would be born... This love will
not only touch you, but it will embrace all of those around you.   

For me the only unfortunate, negative to this much beauty, is
sadly not everyone finds this loveliness ... It’s possible though, it’s out
there, but for me, I believe fate has a huge part to play in this
game of life.  I suppose for now all I can
say is I am fortunate, and lucky in that I believed. Along the way I shared my beliefs with a chosen
few, some laughed, and others advised me to be realistic, but I knew in my
heart there was someone, I had seen a faceless version of him in my dreams, and I told myself I would know when I saw him...
and I did!

My darlings you have your own song, you know how you feel, believe...
take it forward, be what you wish to attract. Be honest, don’t hurt anyone, and
show kindness at all times. Just as I knew there was someone special looking
for me, I also know with that same unshakable, conviction, if we as human beings do all of
the above, the world will become a beautiful place, and all kinds of
beings will live a most wonderful life, especially a life without fear... I speak from experience when
I share; there is nothing worse than fear... I cry every time the news shows that
someone has died, someone is killed, murdered, or even lost and hurt. I don’t
know why, but my heart and soul feels indescribable pain, as if that individual
were my mother, my father, my sister, brother, or daughter etc. I know there
are beautiful people out there, beings who struggle with articulating these same
thoughts, and feelings, I know them to be as as loving as anyone else, and yet they find
being demonstrative, or open a huge challenge. If you struggle to feel
such depth in emotion, to the point it holds you back from being who
you truly are, then all I can disclose is that I was where you are now... I dealt
with it by taking time out to study myself, and rediscover who I was. It was a
tough, but beautiful journey; however it was also uplifting, and enlightening.  I’d never really liked who I was, In the end
though, I learned to like me and soon realised that actually, I wasn’t all that bad. With
it came an understanding of others, as well as myself. I started smiling more at people,
because I wanted to, and not because I had to. I came to
understand how precious a smile is, and the amazing impact it can have on
others.

If you’re reading this, and you don’t have any LOVE in your
life, I want you to know it’s not far away. Be positive, be ready to receive kindness,
and be ready to reciprocate that kindness, because that’s how it returns. Life
is wonderful, and that goes even if your life is currently in the toilet... it’s
a moment in time, and there’s always an end to experiences, which is just as
well given some of the moments some people live.

If your still here...

I would like to take this gorgeous opportunity
to thank you from the bottom of my heart for taking the time to visit my blog,
and read this post. Please come again and know: you will always get a response if you engage.  

I will be back soon.
Meanwhile alllow me to send amazing love,
and peace....  

My Dear Little Janie-kins...

Beautiful Image used with the permission of Clare Colette Smith.

Imagine if we were pre-programmed and able to write a letter to our much younger self... Mine would go something like this...  Please bear in mind the way I’ve written it, is given that I already know so much about what’s played out in this life... However I would want to direct most of my wisdom, sensitivity and love to the small, defenceless, lovable child...

Dearest darling Jane ...

you are such a wonderful little girl. It’s terribly important you recognise that in life some of the adults around you are unfortunately damaged... Sadly my darling girl, they don’t know how to treat a beautiful soul and they definitely don’t have any people skills... It's such a crying shame, that at the beginning of your life you're going to be surrounded by individuals who struggle to interact and neither do they know how to communicate. It will be because of them that you and your siblings will unfortunately suffer... Now I know all of that must sound a little scary, but I more than anyone  appreciate that you knowing all this extra information, will help you to be less anxious when all the bad things happen. You need to understand it’s NOT your fault and remember that these unfortunate individuals, sadly lack in even the basic principles of parenting. They don't know how to be child friendly and most of the time they will be totally inappropriate... exposing you to so much stuff, things that no child should see... But take note Janie, its imperative you read every single word, understand every sentence and share it with your siblings. I write in the hope that it spares all of you the incredible hurt and loneliness that will isolate you, causing untold distress. The suffering that you’ll feel when you’re finally abandoned will not last. I want you to close your eyes tight and remember, in the end they will have done you a great big favour. When it does happen, it will be the making of you. You my darling will blossom and flourish beyond your wildest dreams.  

I hope you’ll be able to use this message, and develop a beautiful, shiny shell that will completely protect you when the going gets tough... Keep remembering how wonderful, caring, loving and extraordinary you are. Hold all of that very close and when you’re being beaten and abused, remember my lovely, close those beautiful eyes, go to your special place and know that the person responsible is sick. It’s not your fault...  The good thing is you’ll come through it all and vecause of who you are, you'll will be alright.

One day gorgeous girl the world will be brighter and you will be the princess that no one told you about. You'll live in a nice home, own clean clothes and take a bubble bath. But my darling, your unfortunate early life will always be led by ‘strangers’ however some of those strangers will be rather special and from each one of them, you will get an essence of the beauty in their characters... now listen Jane, that doesn’t happen for everyone. No, when you're a big girl, the special bits you’ll get, will help make you who you are and the big thing here darling, is the bits you do get, are very special because you get to choose. Keep in mind though Janie, even nasty people have an element of niceness hiding within their character... You don’t know it yet but sweetheart, you’re going to be so lucky because you’ll get to choose all of those best bits for yourself. 

I’m going to leave you with my love and the one thing I’d like to do more than anything my lovely little munchkin, is gather you up, look deep into your eyes, connect and then hug you like you’ve never been hugged before... just to show you there is a world full of love waiting and one day you will hold it all... now don’t forget... you’re a beautiful girl and wonderful things are going to happen! One more thing, I will always be close and even when you don’t see me, you will super sense me and you'll never feel alone.  

I love you little lady.

Especially yours,

Jane xxxx

 

An Affinity...

Image from Free Pics on Google.

 

 



A small collection of words to highlight my thoughts today:

 

All my life I’ve possessed an amazing affinity with the human-race... no matter what’s been thrown my way, I’ve never lost my love for humanity. Yes I know there are bad-apples, but hell, we can’t paint everyone with the same drippy brush... Remember; just as there are bad-apples, there are many more good ones... I'll always challenge wrong doing, or stick up for the under-dog, and if you’re my friend then rest assured that I’ll be loyal till the end.. Unless of course you decide to end it yourself, and then I may, or may not understand, but I would always respect your decision... although I’d question it!  For as long as I can recall I’ve always had an insatiable need to understand, but unfortunately I’ve met a few people who have not been able to shine light on their inconsistent thoughts and actions... I feel sorry for these individuals, because to be unable to discuss feelings, thoughts, and ideas, must be a real lonely deal. 

Those of you who know me, understand I like to share how I feel, how I see things and right now I’m feeling this... I’ve recently had a civilised rant on facebook, and then discussed findings with some lovely peeps... I feel truly blessed to have many gorgeous people in my life, and I will never get tired of telling them... We’re lucky to have each other, and although sad things can often happen, it doesn’t mean we cannot get up and move forward. I think the only time I’ll stop, is when I’ve moved on to my beautiful island in paradise, and even then I’ll continue to strive towards keeping others in mind... It's simple, we just have to take care of each other. I know  to some that might seem crazy, but to me it makes the best sense in the whole wide world. 

Thoughts are where it starts; actions are what make it happen, so if you look to another who is without a smile, then give them one of yours, it’s a great start...   

 

~Jane Ewen~ 

Ageless Souls...

Image used with the kind permission of it's owners.

 

 

A Taster from a piece written for another project:  Ageless Souls...

 

(A long delicate forefinger, firmly presses against soft lips)

“Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh”...  She breathes ....

Her eyes flicker, the deepest, darkest blue...

When I touch you softly you’ll feel my beating heart and those strong, drift-like sensations I always sense... will as if by magic, make you feel as if you’re standing high up on a wild, tangled moor, being whipped by swirling mist, and as it penetrates the core of your ageless soul, then my darling man, your soul will recognise truth, your heart will open just wide enough to accept timeless love, including some long ago forgotten message. Your divine lesson will be that you’ll understand beautifully, the whole truth of who you are, who I am, and where you know you want to be...

Gazing upwards, he smells the scent of her perfume as it fills his nostrils; he wants her... he is dazzled and sees this truth she speaks, he knows she is someone he will never meet again, so he needs to be honest, open and show her his true heart.  Watching intently, she withdraws her forefinger from full delicious lips, this is a woman that history will never repeat in his lifetime...  He senses strongly a Déjà vu moment... he knows her, and as he looks deeper into her pools of darkness, he knows he is well and truly captured when those beautiful, long fingers reach out and touch his skin...

©2014 Jane Ewen

Eden Raven 1849...

Image 'Charles W Morgan 'ship from Wikipedia

A Taster...  

His thoughts dream and drift towards many possibilities. His love for her has no end, but he knows beyond the stars and back, she is many things with many faces... Right now this beautiful woman has produced a tangled labyrinth in his tortured mind. The plot thickens as he senses trouble lurking closer. Now more than ever he knows it's time he steps toward encouraging her to see that his warm heart is genuine and real... Why is this so complicated, why do things have to turn? His observations prove this woman holds her secrets close, inexplicably he knows he's the one to help, the one to be there, hold her close when it all becomes clear... He also knows in this life what you see isn’t always what you get...

There is just one pressing problem, they have yet to meet!

Dense fog swirls dream-like around the largest ship, which lies securely docked against the towns harbour wall.  Frost sparkles from every visible flat surface, and in the slowest of motion, tiny waves hit the ship, making rhythmic thumping sounds from small pieces of ice which bang alongside its beautiful, dark aged wood. This magnificent ship has managed for the longest time, to keep all who have sailed in her, safe. 

Leaning against cold metal of the lamp-post, Drake smiles, he lights yet another cigarette and then puffs acrid grey smoke upwards, towards the bright light of the moon.  He recalls how his mother had time and time again told him the story of his name; she’d wanted to call him ‘Drake’ after Francis Drake, who had sailed around the world in the 1500s. Oh how he smiled when he thought of how her face would crinkle with happiness, at the very thought of her own boy sailing away on his own adventures, taking in the sights and sounds of the world and then bringing them back to share. His mother wanted treasures and stories from the most interesting people, but most of all she wanted to hear about the warmest places.

In his faraway state he jerks as he hears the clip-clop of a maiden’s foot-fall.  

Darting towards the darkness of a nearby door-way, he huddles within. 

Drake’s heart beats faster than a trapped moth whose wings bang savagely against glass in its effort to escape.   

Why is she here again he thought?

The silhouette of a woman glides effortlessly past, stopping briefly she glances round, and then she gently stretches out pale slender fingers, which tightly grip the ships thick rope, she is relieved that there’s no one there. Breathing out, she gingerly embarks upon the ships rickety platform. The bustle her silk dress irritates her, and as she stops again to ensure that she has definitely not been followed, she quietly moves on.   

Drake emerges from the darkness, still cautious just in case she looks back.

Stealthily he creeps along the side of the ship, knowing he just has to follow; he wants to find out what is going on. Nearing the top of the ships platform, he hears voices.

Pressing himself against the creaking wood he holds on to his breath...

“How much?” she cries

“I’ve told you time and time again” he growls.

“Dear sir I cannot afford such an extortionate price; she whimpers, I need you to take me before it’s too late”.

“Get off of my ship this instant and do not come back”

“Please sir I beg of you, I need to go as soon as possible... you are my one and only hope”

“I want 20 pounds and if you can’t afford that, then you need to leave” he smirks.

The young women fights back tears; she would not let this cruel man see her cry.

“I am at your mercy sir... please”

“Get OUT” he screeches... roughly pushing past her he rips open the cabin door and points a bony finger into the darkness.

Back on the platform she hears the cabin door slam shut. Her heart broken, what will she do? The captain is leaving in a few days, and she just didn’t have that kind of money, she was more than willing to pay her fare, she was even prepared to work on board, but dear lord he was not agreeable for that to happen.

Leaning against dark, damp wood, she wipes her eyes; she would figure something out... he was not leaving this harbour without her; she would make sure of that. Holding on to the rope, she makes her way down the platform. Already she has a plan formulating, but it would take some thought... she needed more time.

Once again he moves out from inside the shadows, Drake watches as she disembarks and without looking back she hurries along damp cobbles towards her reluctant destination.  Shaking his head, he makes his way home, but not before following Eden, he must make sure she gets home safely. 

(©) Jane Ewen  2014