Aleta...

The Loft is a place in my mind where my characters begin, 

and stay until they have a job... 

 

Glamorous, pink and fluffy, with lots of ding-a-ma-bling, startled, black eyebrows, 

false lashes, and lashings of blood red lipstick. Yeah you got it... I may have a little problem here.

She came with the loudest noise. I heard her before I saw her, and then I began to wish she wasn’t here. That’s how I felt when I caught sight of my latest Character, who had recently joined us at 'The Loft' in my mind...  Talk about flamboyant, loud and brash. She looks like she belongs on a float in a carnival, and here she is, ordering everyone around, as if she owns the place.  I ask her to be respectful of others, but my goodness the look she gave sent shivers down my spine, however, it did render her speechless, and I’m guessing that doesn’t  happen often.

I introduce myself, and ask her name... her response makes me smile. 
“They call me Aleta, she shouts"
On seeing my quizzical expression, her animated eyes roll to the back of her head, but  she carry's on regardless...

“Aleta, Aleta, Aleta, but here’s the funny part, it means, Truthful... Mythological Goddess of Truth, but listen hunny-bunny, and you take it from me, I aint that” she huffs and chuffs... throws her head back, laughing like a crazed hyena. I thought, Oh my lord, what the heck am I going to do with this one?

Looking up to the double doors of the loft, I see a few characters smile peevishly, as they close the doors, quietly.. 

Oh no, they obviously don't want her in... I think I feel a tantrum coming.  

~MJ Ewen~

(A re-edit from 2014) Image from Pinterest 

Halloween Magic...

 

He thought he'd got away... 

He'd called me strange, told me I was weird, and that nobody would want me... but, he was wrong, and eventually he would see how wrong he'd been. 

Time is of the essence, and your essence will be mine.

There are certain things that don't come easy, and Patience is one of them, but it is written that I have to wait, Why? because there is distinct detail in the small print, and today is the day I Grow into my Magic. It's the time for those little finalities which are needed to seal deals. Halloween is my time to initiate the start of getting what I want. And, what I must have... is him. 

Wait, watch, and weep...

Let my magic begin. 

MJ Ewen 

Don't Tell Me What To Do...

 It's Saturday, my candle flickers, I'm drinking a Smoothie, my darling is working, and Frankie is by my feet...  

What a great day to do what I love best...  

I can't quite believe I completed Chapter 6 yesterday. It's not the longest chapter, but my plan was to keep it short, and not waffle around what happens to Alice Essie. Her story starts out beautiful, but gets unbelievably dark 

It doesn't matter where I go with this novel, Isabelle follows, like a stalker... She isn't the protagonist, but I see shes become the main stay. Well I guess we'll just have to see how Alma develops throughout the chapters, it's in the hands of that little voice inside my head, the content of which I would never try to predict. 

Isabelle, is determined to be, in the words of William Shakespeare, the be-all-and-end-all... Lets keep her on her toes, and give her something to go after. Lets give her a worthy opponent, lets show her that despite beginnings, there are beautiful people in the world, and those beautiful people don't need to be contaminated by those who are broken. 

Chapter 7 here I come... 

Have a wonderful weekend and whatever you do, enjoy, smile, and count your blessings. 

MJ Ewen

  

I Remember...

Image from Pinterest

The dark room, filled with cobwebs, was cold, ice hung from its windows, and as I lay frozen, wet and shivering on the floor, I felt disorientated. I Instantly became alert to the creaking door at the top of the stairs, initially it was being opened slowly, then suddenly, it flew open. She stood staring at me through the wooden grab-rail. Seeing I was awake, she flew down the steps, screaming, grabbed my wrists, and held on claw-like, as she roughly taped them together. Breathing heavy, and with a strange aroma about her, she glanced sideways, and that's when I noticed the plastic sheeting, lying on the floor. 

Terror filled my soul. I knew she was going to kill me. 

I began pleading for my life, and asked what was happening, who was she, and why was she doing this? 

I'll never forget her response, or the dull, dead, flat tone she used to answer. She simply said, 

"Because I can".

(A developing scene from my latest WIP, The Alma Essie Story)  

MJ Ewen 

Another Day...

 

Today went well, even though I was dog sitting, and writing in-between a carers duty. A good word count and an interesting day, pretending to be various characters, and plotting their planners. I particularly love being Isabelle, she is fearless and knows what she wants. I'm looking forward to playing Alma Essie, and seeing how she reacts when she finds out that Isabelle is not the person she thought she was. I know all the characters, the building, and the grounds of Arden Manor. To me its real. Every Character has a story and each chapter will be designed for their story... not sure if it'll work, but I'm trying it anyway. 

My writing journey is progressing, and my tools-of-the-trade are getting me by... I light a candle, flip my hourglass timer, and make sure I have a drink, then I'm good to go. Its practice, practice, practice... I want to work on perfecting the craft, and trying to be the best I can be. I have already said previously that there is no pressure, and my expectations are low, because I found writing and it helped to heal me. something happens when I sit down and tap, tap, tap the keys of my trusty lap-top. 

I just want to be clear... having low expectations doesn't mean I don't want to be published, I do, but, I know its hard out there, so many gifted writers, and the publishing world isn't easy to step into. I enjoy writing, and I'm happy and grateful to be in a position to do it. 

Until, again... 

MJ Ewen 

A Still Mind...

Image shared from Pinterest.

A still mind is everything, and this is whats needed in the Essie household. Alma is yet to tell her tale. Isabelle is Darkness, where Alma is Light. Alma will be introduced shortly and the novel will take on a whole new meaning... The reasons, whys, and wherefores, will come to the front, and plots which have accumulated, and festered, will continue to take on a life of there own. 

My writers journey is exciting, it's one with no expectations, and no pressure. Not everyone gets it. Not everyone will love me... I'm not everyone's cup of tea, but that's ok because I love myself, I've made my peace with most everything, and because I have I find it easy to love and accept others. My writers brain allows healing every-time I sit, think, wonder and visualise, scenes, characters, and plots. I have so much to write, and I never seem to run out of the visual stories which regularly run through my brain, however, I'm fortunate, because I have the time to do this and I know time isn't a luxury that others have.

Till next time... 

MJ Ewen 

 

Inspiration...

 

Oh, this is so true... 

Other people's opinions are just that... Opinions, and of course it goes without saying that they're entitled to theirs. But you my darling, be true to yourself, and if you're at peace then all is well in your world. I have taken time to wish I could make everyone happy, but I can't, and as we know, that's an unrealistic intention... We have to remember; we can't fix everybody!  

There is nothing wrong with having the intention of inspiring others, and motivating where we can. 

Another day of writing and being with the characters in my novel. I find it so relaxing, unless of course I'm struggling with where a character has to go, or what they have to do, but it usually happens as I sit back and ponder.

Have a beautiful day... 

MJ Ewen 

 

Progression...

 

Doesn't It feel good to finish what you start? I finished Chapter 4; and it feels like a real win. And even though I set a deadline that passed... all I can say is that things happen, life takes over, and you do your best.

My novel is set in the early 1900s, and spans 3 generations. It didn't start out like that, it simply developed and progressed, almost on its own.

Initially I wanted to write a short story, because I was taking a break from a fantasy novel that I'd been working on for the longest time. I’d been questioning myself over the length of time it was taking. I felt I’d made it complicated, and maybe that’s why it was taking forever. I wondered if a break would be the answer. I have many ideas, and lots of characters on the back-burner, waiting for their stories.

So, I’m happy to report that my New Work in Progress, is coming along fine. It starts with a Prologue set in 1996, and to-date there are 4 completed chapters.

I have an outline, and for that I use my chapters titles, which keep me on track.

The protagonist is Alma, Sarah Essie, who is born into a wealthy family. The family live in a mansion called, Arden Manor, and they’re lucky to be able to afford hired-help, which includes Rachel, the housekeeper, who has a 10 year old daughter, Isabelle.  The novel is mainly about their relationship, lives and stories.

Isabelle, is many things, and develops and unwinds, sharing stories, around fear, failure, hate, rage, deceit, jealousy, obsession and worse, much worse… and, as the years go by, her jealousy of Alma, knows no bounds. 

Each character, and there are a few, have their own story, and these are shared as the novel unfolds.

Have a wonderful week, and progress as you go!

 

MJ Ewen    

The Loft... In My Mind.

Picture kindly shared from Pinterest.

The loft in my mind is open 24/7... It’s a place for characters who want to transpire in my next story, or book. I’ve heard them say they chose me to ensure their story is heard; they need a connection, oh and a place to stay... It’s disappointing but I've had to disengage from a couple of characters; they were dark, too dark to live in the loft. With help from the rest of the residents, their removal was relatively quick because the lofts residents won’t put up with anything, or anyone who tries to take over... Dear lord, don’t ever let anyone try to take over.  The chances are the residents will take over, and we won’t see the character again.

(At first it was as if the statement below was heard through an old radio)

“My dream multiplies; it looks, sees, and wants what it wants all of the time”.

These words greeted me last night as I tried to relax. Initially I attempted to ignore them because I knew this had to be a new character trying to move into the loft but I'd been writing all day, I wanted to rest.  

“If you don’t listen then I’ll keep saying it, my dream multiplies, it looks, sees, and wants what it wants all of the time” (Silence)

(Someone) breathes a heavy Sigh... 

“My dream multiplies; it looks, sees, and wants what it wants all of the time”

That someone is breathing to the point where I can literally feel its frustration as it seeps into my bones.

“My dream multiplies; it looks, sees, and wants what it wants all of the time”

I should speak, maybe even acknowledge its presence but to be honest I can’t tell whether it’s male, or female. Maybe it’s neither, maybe it’s from the other side? I’ve had a few of them, and again, not a pleasant experience.

 “My dream multiplies; it looks, sees, and wants what it wants all of the time”

“Ok, ok... Bloody hell I’m coming”.

Reluctantly and with much annoyance I progress towards the staircase... here is where I always find them. Their either sat on the bottom step, draped over the banister, or persistently knocking on the lofts huge double doors, which by the way would never get an answer, because the residents have stopped opening the door to strangers. So they wait for me. 

The smell was atrocious ... I smelt him before I saw him, and I wasn’t prepared for what I was about to see. A small skinny man with knobbly knees, he wasn’t wearing any trousers, however he was wearing shiny shorts. His white string vest had seen better days. I couldn’t believe the oversized trainers with no socks, and his small bony face housed dark sunken eyes, it was as if two thumbs had pressed them into an oversized skull.  On his head wispy bits of what looked like hair waved like seaweed, but for the most part he was bald. On his forehead he had a long, rather strange looking scar which was shaped like a bolt of lightning. His hooked nose protruded like that of an eagle.  I noted and quickly recoiled from his grubby hands, nails were bitten and black, as if he’d been digging dirt all day. He was standing at the bottom of the stairs, and lying on the floor by his feet was a small, brown, dingy looking suitcase.

Clearing my throat I asked what I could do for him.

“Ahh you came” he boomed.

Now there was a voice that didn’t suit this man.

“Yes I usually come when summoned, especially if a room is needed for the night”

“I need it longer, much longer, and maybe longer still”.

He stood, moving from one foot to the other in a most irritated fashion.

“What can I do for you sir?”

"I need somewhere to stay, and with someone who can make my dreams, nightmares go away”

Uneasy, he looked around...

“What are you running away from?” I enquired, (no point in beating about the bush)

"Nothing... no one, just down on my luck and need company”

“You wouldn’t be bringing any bad luck to my door now would you?”

No answer...

“Would you?”

“Of course not, like I said, need a place to stay and some company”

“Do you work around here?”

“Yes I work close by, came straight from there and needs me a shower”

Lip licking and nervous tension, (I didn’t like this...)

“Tell you what sir; I’ll see if there are any vacancies... I’ll be right down”

I knew I hadn’t made the right noises, his dark eyes smouldered as dirty, bony fingers twitched.

At the top of the stairs I knocked, a resident opened it a crack.

“Any vacancies?” silence rebounded as the resident stepped forward, and looked down the stairs eyeballing the character.

“Who wants to know” the resident replied hoarsely.

“I do” came the skinny mans booming response.

“Come closer and we’ll discuss”

The skinny man dragged his suitcase up the stairs; his eyes never left the resident.

"I’m looking to stay for a few days, need company and some routine”

“Is that right?” said the resident as a few more voices vibrated from the door.

“Well this is how it goes, we don’t like noise, disrespect, or parties; no strangers are allowed, and no smoking, we have a rota for cleaning the kitchen and bathroom daily, any problems with that?”

“No problem at all, I’m not after looking for any trouble, just need accommodation”. The resident made way and made a gesture with his hand towards the door, and as it opened all that could be seen from within was dark shadows.

Just as he got to the perimeter of the door, skinny man looked around, winked at me as he whispered,

“I’ll be seeing you”. He was gone.

“You’re letting him in then?” I nodded to the resident.

“Yep, any funny business like the last one and you’ll hear from us soon enough or maybe you won’t”.

As the resident blinked green, lizard like eyes, I rubbed my chin as I considered our new character, a character that will certainly get creative juices flowing; he obviously has issues, possibly some interesting history. Doesn’t really matter, he managed to get his oversized, sockless feet through the door to the loft, and if you knew the Loft’s residents that is indeed a massive achievement. 

Stay tuned for updates.

 

©2015 Jane Ewen

 

 

 

The Loft...

I recently read a quote by C.S Lewis:

 “I never exactly made a book. It’s rather like taking diction. I was given things to say.”

 I identify with his words, so much so, I have a space in my own land of make-believe!  

For quite a long time I’ve been creating characters, it’s got to the point where they talk to me, and dreamlike they make my stories seem real. Once created these characters are as authentic to me as family.  Early on I realised I needed a place to keep my personalities, somewhere they would be safe, and comfortable... so a lounge in the Loft of my mind was formed. My characters appear especially when I’m asleep, and sometimes, they come when I’m not even writing, a figure often appears in my mind’s eye, and it’s as if they were waiting in the shadows prior to stepping forward into the light. Sometimes when I’m driving the most amazing individual will materialise. When I do use those wonderful characters from the loft of my mind, it is they who speak, and like C.S. Lewis quite clearly states, I am also given things to say...

I have a facebook writer’s page: https://www.facebook.com/Jane.Ewen?ref=hl#!/Jane.Ewen which I write in daily, and recently I published a few posts just to give my readers a flavour, and hopefully a comprehensible sense of these delightful, and some not so delightful characters, and their instances... My included posts are tiny snippets of what has recently happened, and how I have dealt with them.

No. 1.

In the gloom they reach out to me...

Snoring gently, it doesn't take long for the characters that live in the loft of my mind to shake me awake. They demand attention... Rolling over I successfully manage to block out their unwelcome noise, and as I drift back to sleep, I very quickly step into dream world. Straining to see through swirling fog I glimpse a strange-looking couple who walk towards me with determination. It’s strange, but I know these two, and I sense they’re going to be important to my future in the writing world. They smile a smile that I would imagine is usually saved for the criminally-insane. Their rhythmic walk is obviously to their own beat. Their attire is from a bygone age. The hair on the back of my neck stands on end giving me a shivering shudder, which clearly tells me, all is not going to be well. Opening my eyes the fog clears, and as my trusty characters stand before me shaking their heads, we all witness the unsavoury couple step inside the double door of our loft... This is not good, and as I look towards my characters for support, they slowly step back into the shadows. I look into the lounge, and see the couple with their insane smiles fall backward onto the lofts leather sofas...

Ooh dear, it really is time to leave...

~ Jane Ewen ~

No. 2.

In the loft of my mind this morning...

The odd couple’s apparently missing; the atmosphere is tense, and a note lies strewn across the coffee table... It says,

'Be prepared'

l look up just in time to see my beloved characters, once again, step back into the gloomy shadows... For a second it all feels unreal, and then I realise the experience is like enjoying each scene as if watching the big screen. There is only one problem... I know the odd couple’s not missing, they are merely hiding!  

~ Jane Ewen ~

No. 3.

So much noise, the loft is banging tonight...

Delirious with exhaustion I gulp deep breaths of cinnamon scented air. With much annoyance, and immense irritation I stand to go and see what the hell is going on.

With bare feet I pound up each terracotta step, I reach double doors to the loft of my mind, and up to now this is where my characters have shared a lounge they call the loft.

I could really do without this... It’s been the longest day. All I want to do is rest, but no, they’re at it again. This is not acceptable, and these interruptions are starting to become customary.

I wonder what their excuse will be this time.

Pushing open the doors which shine silver and gold, I’m greeted by the newest character whose long black hair and tiny shoulders explode right into me; I grab her tiny frame to prevent her from falling over. Looking down I witness the relief in her eyes as she sees me.

“What the hell is going on?”

“Jane oh my god I am so relieved to see you, the odd couple are causing much distress... I thought I’d be able to handle them, but they cause much fear in the rest of the residents”

Pushing her back into the lounge I look around... the shadows are darker than I remember, however I’m able to see the scuffle of my guests as they huddle in the darkness.

“Where are they” I whisper...

“They have moved the sofa into the furthest recess where the light never touches, and they consistently growl at us, which is causing much concern”

I didn’t like this couple when they appeared, but my instincts knew they would eventually be needed, however the disruption is becoming abysmal... A heavy oppressive feel was in the air.

“Please Jane is there anything you can do about them?” Her eyes wide with fear looked from me into the darkness.

“Yes I can do something”

Gently I move her to one side,

“Wait here”

“No Jane don’t go near them, they told me they are going to kill you”

“Its fine, don’t worry”

The steps I take towards the back of the lounge seem to take forever; I know this isn’t going to be pleasant. I need to eradicate this couple, and destroy their dreadful essence from this vicinity, my characters are suffering, and that’s not going to continue. I turn back briefly to see the new young girl biting her hands; her pleading look causes my heart to beat a little faster than normal, I smile reassuringly as I turn back to the task in hand.

I was just on the perimeter of the place where I knew the odd couple were sitting; hesitantly I step into their space.

In their darkness is bright light, and they are in reclined positions, drinking steaming coffee.

Both of them grin pleased to see me, there is a feeble offer of coffee.

“NO ... I am here on official business, you have to leave with immediate effect, and I am here to escort you off the property”

There is a lot of bumbling, blundering about why and what have we done...

“There will be no explanation, do not disrespect me with your insane, pretence of innocence, I will take you forthwith, and I want you to know, this is not the end, I wish for you to return, but only when the time is right... There will be an opening, but the time is all wrong.

Two dark, demonic grins reach out in an attempt to allure me; their hands stretch out to shake mine...

“Do not bother with your futile charade; I know you are here to hurt, to destroy, to cause mayhem, but not yet you don’t, not yet... Stay behind me, and I will escort you to a place where you can stay until such time as I need to use your skills, your talents”

As they move up behind me I smell the stench of disgust, I walk slowly through the lounge knowing we’re in the light of my current characters. It is then I observe shadows move out from the darkness, the shadows have bodies, faces and no longer look frightened, because right in front of them is the newest little character, she stands strong, and smiling...

The odd couple smirk with a knowing, and as I take them quickly through the double doors, they raise their fists in defiance to the characters they were leaving behind.

Come I demand almost shrieking, Come...  

~Jane Ewen~

No. 4.

The Loft is quiet...

Being of a curious nature I slip onto the staircase, and stealthily I creep up towards the silver and gold double doors which lead into the lounge, in the loft of my mind.

The peace today has been heaven. Leaning up against the doors I gently breathe a sigh of relief for the silence from within... How could the odd couple have caused so much mayhem? The newbie however is showing promise; she's a good all-rounder... In the blink of an eye the door opens and stupidly, I fall in...

"Jane sorry... oh my god, are you ok?"

"Yes" I laugh, picking myself up off the floor.

"What are you doing here?” she asks as she nervously looks around.

"Don't worry its fine, I'm just making sure all is well"

"The truth is Jane; we've had the best day in a long time. Guests are talking, activity level has been high, a couple of characters still lurk in the shadows, but there have been no malevolent, spiteful acts that might jeopardise the whole house"

I look into her eyes... I'm a good judge of character; this one definitely sends flashing, alarm bells to the centre of my brain. Without blinking an eyelash, I move away...

"That's good news. Thank you for the update"

Walking towards the terracotta staircase, I half turn back, just in time to catch a glimpse of the newest character, and her shifty demeanour... My trusty instinct screams, all is not as it seems, but that's ok, because I have plans for this young lady.

The plots, and storylines I create will hopefully make you, my reader, beg for more...

So my beautiful newcomer with your long Black hair which lies softly against small, pale shoulders, sleep tight as you gather strength, because believe me, you're going to need it, not just for yourself, but for others as well. They however, don't know what you're capable of as you live effortlessly as a chameleon... HA, you will be just as I designed you to be. Good or bad though my little one, you will have your story to tell... Good job the odd couple will be in the back ground to lend a hand, as you express the journey you must take.

Ahh In bed at last, eyes tight shut; I hum the tune to a favourite lullaby... I know she's listening, stay alert little lady.  Be prepared...

~ Jane Ewen ~

No 5.

The loft has settled down...

characters are happier. However, do not be misled, the double doors were knocked tonight, and I have it on good authority that a rather special character has been admitted.

Ooh my good Lord, what the hell have I done?


~ Jane Ewen will be back ~