The Gypsy...

Just imagine... 

your walking along the road to nowhere, you know somethings got to happen because your life's in the gutter, and, you also realise that If you disappeared right now, no one would miss you. You've accomplished nothing. Your thoughts and mood, have been dark for a long time. 

You look around but your vision is cloudy, you're walking, aimlessly. Then it starts snowing. Within a couple of minutes the snow begins to fall hard. You're not dressed for winter, you left the house in a hurry.  Music, you hear music. It's a Christmas Carol...  we wish you a merry Christmas... we wish you a merry Christmas...  its Christmas!  Is it really Christmas? her intuition tells her to follow the music.

In the distance the glow from fairy lights cuts through the haze of falling snow. There are voices, music, and laughter.  It's been so long since I laughed.  I wonder, could I do that again? ... Maybe not.  Since you left, the world's felt lonely, and the way you left confirmed my importance.  Since then, my time has been spent reevaluating who I am, my purpose, and where I'm going, or actually, do I want to be here? and like a recording, I'm stuck...  Death is final.  Its so inviting, but not to be taken lightly. I need to think everything through.  Mind you, its not like anyone will miss me, but have I finished, am I really done?

Gaiety is up ahead, the music sounds beautiful, but can I feel beauty, right now? So many questions, so much uncertainty. The music alters, it's gypsy music, violins, and fiddles, jig out the beautiful, and the dark, reminding me of how we use to dance. 

Wiping snow from my eyes, I'm startled as a tall lady steps out from in-front of her brightly coloured stall, 

"Hello my lovely, may I invite you into my space, I have a feeling you won't regret your visit"

Her dark curly hair, cascades down, despite being tied up in a bright turban scarf which holds golden coins that jiggle as she moves. Dressed like a Gypsy, her dark eyes softly stare. She's waits for an answer. 

What do I have to lose? I whisper to myself. Her patience is inspiring,  I know I'm supposed to answer, but this overwhelming, inadequate feeling, monopolises my mind.

"Come, let's talk, I sense you need a friend"

Feeling comfortable, I reach out to hold her hand. The Gypsy pulls me through her sequinned curtain, revealing the smallest room which is beautifully decorated. A tiny round table, two blue velvet covered chairs, shelves, that home books, trinkets and treasures. In the middle of the table sits the most exquisite, crystal snow globe, which rests on a intricate, gold stand, raising it from the linen it sits upon. My senses heighten, I smell delicious aromas, and essential oils.  

"Please, take a seat, let your experience begin" 

Sitting down, I'm unable to draw my eyes away from the globe, its light reflects silver, and golden specs of incredible light, whilst tiny flecks of snow, float around a scene I can't quite see...

The Gypsy settles herself, and asks,

"Shall we begin, my lovely?" 

MJ Ewen

Lets all Be Kind...

 

I live for the moments I can put Magic into my words.... 

Whilst watching TV today, I was reminded of the Be Kind Campaign.

My heart went out to the mum's who'd lost their children to suicide, and how their deaths were due to being relentlessly bullied in school... by their peers.  Young people, who were just like them, and who continued to hurt these beautiful souls. 

I was also bullied as a child,  and not just in school.  I would leave an abusive home and vomit on my way to school, because I was fearful of the constant barrage of abuse in all of my locations.  

Physical, and mental. 

I'm older now, and often wonder how I recovered...

Thankfully I was removed from the abuse, and it was said I survived because somehow I became resilient, and able to distance myself. I was one of the lucky ones, and healed. But, its super important for us all to be good role-models, and show our babies, and our young people that being kind, gentle, and compassionate, is the only way to be. It's also true that being kind is much better for us and our own well-being, than it is to be unkind, and nasty. 

Do not be responsible for hurting hearts and souls, or for making others feel like they don't want to be here... we're all connected, we just need to remember that we really do rise when we lift others.

for those of us following the Be Kind Movement...

Be Kind was established in 2015 with the aim of celebrating and amplifying the power of kindness through education. Our passion lies in developing emotional intelligence (EQ) skills using the medium of film to influence, impact and embed 10 values of kindness in children and young people.

https://www.bekindmovement.co.uk/ 

MJ Ewen

Another Day...

 

Today went well, even though I was dog sitting, and writing in-between a carers duty. A good word count and an interesting day, pretending to be various characters, and plotting their planners. I particularly love being Isabelle, she is fearless and knows what she wants. I'm looking forward to playing Alma Essie, and seeing how she reacts when she finds out that Isabelle is not the person she thought she was. I know all the characters, the building, and the grounds of Arden Manor. To me its real. Every Character has a story and each chapter will be designed for their story... not sure if it'll work, but I'm trying it anyway. 

My writing journey is progressing, and my tools-of-the-trade are getting me by... I light a candle, flip my hourglass timer, and make sure I have a drink, then I'm good to go. Its practice, practice, practice... I want to work on perfecting the craft, and trying to be the best I can be. I have already said previously that there is no pressure, and my expectations are low, because I found writing and it helped to heal me. something happens when I sit down and tap, tap, tap the keys of my trusty lap-top. 

I just want to be clear... having low expectations doesn't mean I don't want to be published, I do, but, I know its hard out there, so many gifted writers, and the publishing world isn't easy to step into. I enjoy writing, and I'm happy and grateful to be in a position to do it. 

Until, again... 

MJ Ewen