PAST, PRESENT and FUTURE...
I have been
away from my much-loved Blog for a while; I have so much to share, and so much
to tell... I do like to talk about my past, present and future... those of you
who know me understand how I’m happily able to unconditionally share the clean-up process of my
child-hood. I’ve been able to do this because quite rightly I grew to
understand, the adults involved made a right old mess of it. I have been blessed
to at last be able to let go of the past and forgive, but even at this point in
time the one thing I've found difficult to do, is FORGET... joyfully though, I
have managed to stop it from making me sad, and that blissfully happened when I finally
forgave. For me overcoming
insecurities unlocked enormous courage, which I realise silently resides deep within each and everyone of us... I am fortunate because I've
managed to developed a true healing heart however, despite this abundant knowledge,
I occasionally get the odd crack but thank goodness I have my writing, my
words, my family and friends as well as myself... All I
understand, is that you cannot live In fear and experience love.
I
love to engage, I love to share, I love to show and I love to tell. This is
something that’s grown with age, but for me showing vulnerability, being transparent
with a genuine soul, and able to demonstrate
love is the positive way forward, and if I am these things and more then I will
not falter on my journey. I love to see light in people’s eyes, it shows that
possibly they are open, they are listening, and I further understand it’s not
over for that person, and there's evidence that they will be fine if they are receptive
to help, advice and support... for me as long as a light shines there is a promise,
a chance.
I
have found I am able to stand strong, and I always do what I have to do, but sometimes,
depending on the amount of deception present in another, and because I am not
made from stone, I very often feel sad, even a little disappointed in their
ability to communicate, however this doesn’t deter me, it spurs me on to be
able to show them, that not everybody should be painted with the same brush... It
also saddens me that a whole lot of people seem hell-bent on labelling another’s
good intentions, and will create barriers, this is perfectly acceptable if they
have been through a lot, but then there comes a point when another can only do
so much to prove oneself or their actions ... I believe those individuals are
the hardest to come to terms with, because it just reinforces what I’ve been
told a million times...
You
cannot fix everyone!
But
why not!
If
a hurt/damaged person sits, we have a conversation, you respectfully listen, you
share your heart and soul, you go on to give strategies and with their input
you show a plan for the future, and then you realise still, damn, this isn’t enough,
then the alternative for me is the head banging fact, one has to reluctantly
walk away, and that my friend is a very hard thing to do. I guess I’ve personally overcome much, I
know it’s not been easy, but I also know ‘WE’ cannot blame our past for everything;
it really infuriates me that some people will do that and then carry on to
blame their upbringing for some of the most heinous crimes that they’ve done.
There is a time when we must take and accept responsibility for our own choices and existence,
and move on with decorum.
May courage,
confidence and strength always be yours...
Don’t
forget till next time, Stay Close!
AngelJane
